Mother and father had arrived to see the new baby. My wife Ostkaalkaluvilee and I had become parents for the first time and my parents had arrived on the first available star-jumper.
"So, tell us, darling, what have you decided to call your child?"
I took a deep breathe, realising that this wasn't going to go too well. "We have decided to call him Bob."
A look of bemusement quickly turned to shock, then horror as my mother sat up straight in her chair. I could feel the tidal wave of disgust hit me before she even said a thing.
"Pavilylo Paleeonaloloonapaso, in the name of all that is sacred in the Five Worlds, what were you thinking? That's not a name for a Skurantariag. Where did you come up with a name like...Bob?" I could see the disappointment in my father's face, but he was smart enough to stay out of the argument and let Mother deal with it.
"Mother Paleeonaloloonapaso, Pavilylo and I decided long ago that if we were to breed, we were going to break the tradition of many centuries and name our children simply. The amount of time taken just signing in to each Stardock is incredible and we thought that this was the best way to go, with his future in mind."
Father stood up, and with an almost imperceptible nod of his head, Mother quickly followed, but she couldn't resist one parting shot.
"Bob? BOB? He will be ridiculed his whole life. I hope you are both happy with yourselves."